ah the new year is upon us...finally....a fresh start of sorts.

this year has been a whilwind of events and emotions and happenings.

i remeber being drunk when it came in last year thinking good god please let this year be better. was it in fact better? it was good and it was full of events.

the valentine's day spent with friends where we all thought we would never end up again. we swore by next year we'll all be sitting here with our significan't others. most everyone we know paired up with someone this year. ah love was in the air. to bad i'm stuck in an airless pit of sand. the months are a blur with only key events still hanging in the air.

jenn and her adventures in chicago. john saying goodbye to school and learn. the loss of my virginity. the LSAT. the new tattoo the night before. my birthday of fondue. christmas with everyone for two weeks. five four three two one and its all over.

what will the new year bring? will i finally find the love i'm looking for. will i finally end my self destructive streak. will i get into the law school i want. will i even be here for it all next year?? this was the year that everything that had become ended and changed. will the new year really be everything that i've been waiting for??

i need new things i need to find everything. i need to let go of all that has happened and be okay with it. i loved it so i have to let it go....

happy new year...

back&forth